Our mother raised us lovingly, on food, church and words.
Some of her words came from the Bible, of course. Many were old family sayings, old Jamaican/British proverbs, or came from sources unknown.
If we judged another person harshly, my siblings and I would hear this one:
“There is so much good in the worst of us
And so much bad in the best of us
That it doesn’t behoove any of us
To speak evil of the rest of us.”
Just recently, I Googled the saying’s origin and found it attributed to two Americans: Edward Wallis Hoch, and Edgar Cayse both born in the 19th century. Hoch’s version ends slightly differently:
“…That it hardly behooves any of us
To talk about the rest of us.”
I don’t know who said it first. But as far as her children are concerned, Mama said it best!
Cynthia Reyes 
“behooves” – boy, do I remember that word being spoken. Seems like adults used to use very formal formidable words when trying to correct kids and shove them in the right direction. Better, more effective than yelling
Nice post
It’s one of those words rarely heard today, for sure. I used to wonder what hooves had to do with it.
Still say you should do a small book with all of her sayings.
Hamlin Grange
>
You could be right. I have so many!
What a great memory to share and such an important statement for every parent to share with their children! What a difference that statement could make in this world! Great post
Tina, she had a saying for every occasion, and every misdeed. Every so often, I remember another one. Thanks for commenting.
A wise woman! Especially for today in the U.S. — Super Tuesday.
Wise words from Mama. 🙂 Words can feed us or tear us down. Thanks Cynthia!
Right on!
Far out! I’m a peacenik too. XD
Wise words Cynthia.
Thank you, Andrea. Such a wise woman she was.
I loved this. There is so much wisdom in those words.
Blessings,
Theresa
Thank you, Theresa. She was so wise.
Sometimes the words from a mother hold a great deal of truth. I still remember some of my mother’s words and have found myself saying them to my children.
Isn’t that funny, when you hear yourself repeating words your mother used to say, all these years later?
I like that one. It’s very true!
Tis so indeed.
Your mother was such a wise woman. This post is a beautiful memorial to her!
I will second that, Clare, as you have already chosen the words I would have used myself. Cynthia’s mother was a wise woman, and this post is a beautiful memorial to her.
Thank-you Lavinia.
So then I thank you BOTH, Lavinia and Clare. I miss my mother and her loving wisdom.
Thank you. She really was wise.
Reproves with behooves are the best. How could you not grow up interested in language and literature with such wonderful sayings in your ears! One of my mother’s was “His strength is as the strength of 10 because his heart is pure.” That is a modified version of the quote; not sure who modified it.
I love that one too! I grew up hearing it, but as an adult, I heard it said most often by Tim Knight. Where did it come from? Sounds like it’s from either the Bible or the Arthurian legend.
It’s from Sir Galahad by Tennyson. ( had to look it up the other day!) I don’t think I know Tim Knight. ??
Yes, of course. Arthurian indeed. Tim is my editor-mentor-friend who now lives in South Africa.
Ah, of course, I see the connection now!
Nothing to do with hooves here. In the UK we say ‘ behoves’. It’ s funny that people never behove, always ‘ it behoves’. Here it is often coupled with ‘ ill’ as in ‘ it ill behoves…’
My mother never said things like that. Her maxims were ‘make sure you have a clean handkerchief’ and ‘ don’ t draw attention to yourself’.
Your comment gave me a big smile. Didn’t your mother ever say “always wear clean underwear?” Even in Latin?
Of course; she said you must always have clean knickers on, in case you are run over by a bus.
I’m laughing at the last part of your sentence now. Tee hee…. I remember replying to my mother: “But if that happens, who will care about my underwear?” The unspoken answer undoubtedly was: “I will. I’m your mother!”
Wise words indeed, thank you for sharing Cynthia!
Thanks for commenting, Mrs. Walker.
Like you Cynthia, I too was brought up on the words of the bible. It gave me such a clear view of what was right and wrong and those guidelines live on inside me today, as I am sure they do in you.
Indeed, Karen. A lot of great guidelines for life in the good book.
I’ve just spent some time thinking about similar lessons from my mother and grandmothers–thanks for sending me down that bit of memory’s lane!
You are most welcome. I think I’m up to about 50 sayings now, and maybe more if I add the grandmothers and great- grand as well.
So very true, great words to live by! Thanks, Cynthia
this is incredible – the words and content is so important and powerful..
Thank you, Mihrank.
Oh Cynthia-things our parents said do stick with us. I remember coloring the “golden rule” about treating others as you wish to be treated/do unto others what you wish them to do unto you….you remember these things and they sure do mold our character:-) Mom does know best…I wonder what my kids will remember:-)
Good point. Now that you mention it, I wonder the same. Ah, the golden rule. That sure stuck with us too.
What a great saying:). My mother, in Germanic style, simply told us to “be kind.” I think your mother’s way might have made me listen a bit more:). Some poetry to it.
That’s one way of putting it: poetry. But I didn’t think so at the time! “Be kind” is an excellent guideline.
I’m sure you didn’t! Lol. Am guessing there was an eye roll or two in response:).
You got it. But we were sure to cast our eyes downward.
We used to hear this too, with slightly different words. Lovely to hear it again.
Thanks, Hilary. Hope all goes well.
Hear hear! 😄
I’m with you, Cynthia. Recently I realized one of my favorite sayings I’d learned from my parents did not originate from them. But I think they said it best. Are you curious which wise words your daughters attribute to you?
Blessings ~ Wendy
That’s terrific! I’ve never heard it before but will keep it in my bag of favorites form here out!
Your mother sounds like a wise and compassionate woman.
Very much so, Jason. I’m in awe of her.
The reputable site at
http://www.bartleby.com/78/134.html
notes that Hoch denied creating those lines. The site rules out some other people to whom the lines have been attributed but couldn’t determine the author.
Thank you, Steve. Whoever said it originally, Mama said it best!
Funny the things our parents said to us isn’t it, and how they stay with us.
Very heartwarming post about your mama. Thank you so much for sharing it with us! She sounds like a very lovely woman. 🙂