A Good Home, Inspiration, Prayer

Sometimes ….

I sometimes think that I’ve given you entirely the wrong impression.

That I’m strong, brave, and always optimistic.

Blog Photo - Late pink clematis solo

Truth is, I’m a recovering coward.

There have been times in recent years when I’ve felt completely weak, unwise and pessimistic.

Times when fear turned my insides to mush and great challenges brought me to my knees.

But as one friend says: “While you’re down there, you may as well pray”.

Sometimes, I had to pray several times before my insides finally returned to normal and I remembered: “All I need to do is put one foot in front of the other. And trust.”

Blog Photo - pansies - blue CU

Sometimes, putting one foot in front of the other meant writing a funny or optimistic post on my blog. Trusting that you’d read it, smile and be uplifted.

And sometimes it meant just going back to my bed. (And while there, perhaps reading a few of your own updates to cheer myself up.)

All of which may prove that the great philosopher Soren Kierkegaard was right when he said: “The function of prayer is not to influence God, but rather to change the nature of the one who prays.”

Blog Photo - Blue clematis2

Thanks for being there. These flowers are for you.

I end this post with a blessing from a Margaret Mair poem:

May the day hold you gently
In the softness of its hope
And the sun guide you surely
To where you find yourself
Contented and free
In the kindness of its light.


Photos courtesy of Hamlin Grange.






84 thoughts on “Sometimes ….”

  1. This blessing is similar to the traditional Gaelic blessing.
    ‘ May the road rise up to meet you.
    May the wind be always at your back.
    May the sun shine warm upon your face;
    The rains fall soft upon your fields,
    And until we meet again,
    May God hold you gently in the palm of his hand.’
    Although I am not in any way religious, I really love John Rutter’ s version of a Gaelic blessing with the Cambridge singers. You can find it on YouTube.
    Best wishes and blessings to you Cynthia.

    1. Well, don’t ask me why, Chloris, but this blessing, from you and Lavinia too, brought tears to my eyes. I will go wash my face with very cold water, then kick myself in the posterior (if only that were possible) and smile in gratitude.

  2. Beautiful post, Cynthia! Beautiful flowers by Hamlin, and a lovely poem by Margaret Mair!

    My aunt has a saying that goes, “Sometimes you give 90%, sometimes you take it.” Although she was describing marriage, it really applies to life in general. There are time when we all have to lean on, and depend on, the support of others, and there are times when others will draw from our own strength. There is nothing cowardly in that. That is life.

    I leave you with an old Irish blessing:

    May the road rise up to meet you.
    May the wind always be at your back.
    May the sun shine warm upon your face,
    and rains fall soft upon your fields.
    And until we meet again,
    May God hold you in the palm of His hand.

  3. Bless you Cynthia, you eloquently say what so many of us feel. Thanks for sharing. Now I don’t feel so bad about those days when I get up for a couple of hours then crawl back into bed for a few more. Other days I’m on a roll from sunset till after sundown. It’s all good.

  4. May God hold you in the palm of his hand, Cynthia. I’m an atheist, and Irish, and that phrase always touches me. “God” to me means all that is good. Thank you Chloris for reminding us of that blessing.

    1. He read your comment for himself, Amy, and was so pleased!

      I liked Soren Kierkegaard most of all the philosophers I read in university. More even than Hegel, Camus, the whole lot of them. Perhaps I was just intrigued that one could be both an existentialist and a Christian….

      1. After taking Philosophy 101 in college – I found that I am really not a deep thinker. I could understand design philosophy, but chemistry was way too conceptual and so was philosophy.

      2. That may be why I liked Kierkegaard – he was easy to understand. Now, chemistry? Hats off to everyone who understands it (not you and me). And talk about deep thinking: you can understand design philosophy, something that completely escapes me, even to this day.

    1. Thank you, my dear. I did give up in earlier years, but I didn’t like where it took me. So I decided that I may as well live…. OK, I’m smiling as I write that last part there.
      Wishing you a good day, and both those blessings – the Irish one and the Margaret Mair’s.

  5. This post is so perfect. It speaks to my current situation. I was so blessed as I meditated on the word this morning and prayed with a friend. Then I read this comforting confirmation.

    “3 Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort;

    4 Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.

    5 For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also aboundeth by Christ.” 2 Corinthians 1:3-5

    Thank you!

  6. Cynthia, this post is a perfect example of why I love your writing. You do, indeed, lift my mood, my spirit, and my hope with your words (and with Hamlin’s lovely photography). Your bravery in being honest about your own heart encourages us to be bold too. ❤
    Blessings & hugs ~ Wendy

  7. I think we’ve all been there at one time or another, when staying in bed seems like the easiest way.
    I find that being out in nature is better for not just my health but my outlook as well, certainly better than any pill or doctor that I’ve ever had. I hope you’ll have great weather this summer so you can spend some time outside.

    1. I agree about being out in nature, Allen. And yes, I’m looking forward to the milder temperatures. I’ll take anything that’s not freezing or too wet!
      Thanks for your reply and ‘happy walks!”

  8. Its brave to admit how you feel Cynthia, lots of us do not. But please know lots of us are wishing you well and thinking of you. xx

    1. Thank you, dear Julie. I do understand people who don’t admit how they feel. One thing the catastrophe of recent years has done for me: I have shed most of my false pride and pretense. (Not all of it, mind you.)
      However, I do hope I have retained some hint of dignity! (smile)

      Be well, Julie.

  9. We have all been cowards at some time. You are brave to share your emotions with us with encouragement and hope. Your posts are always laced with joy and beauty and hope! Thanks for the flowers and poem! There is no shame in feeling down as long as you get back up!

    1. Thank you for saying this. I, and others reading this, appreciate it. There are some brave people in our blogging community, who need to be reminded that there is no shame in falling; just keep getting back up, as you say here.

  10. You are brave because no matter how bad it has got you have continued to try to live your life as well as you can. You pick yourself up and have another go.
    You are brave because no matter how awful you must be feeling you respond to our comments and to our posts with humour and great intelligence.
    May God bless you and keep you and all who are dear to you.
    Hamlin’s photos are a joy as always.

    1. Ah, Clare. You are a remarkable woman. Your life is a wonderful example of picking oneself up and having another go. Thanks for these kind comments, and for the nod to Hamlin’s photos.

    1. What? Hamlin’s photos made you smile, but what about all those nonsense poems I wrote in earlier months, specifically to make you smile? Did you mention those? No-o-o-o.
      OK, I just wanted to make you smile again. And Hamlin and I thank you for your compliment on his photos.

  11. Beautiful post Cynthia, the others before me have said it all so eloquently. Nothing more to add. Hugs

  12. Merci Cynthia pour ton partage vrai et humble : ça fait du bien. Hier soir encore, nous partagions avec des amis sur le sujet de la peur, de la confiance… J’aime beaucoup la citation que tu as partagée : La fonction de la prière est de ne pas influencer Dieu, mais plutôt de changer la nature de celui qui prie.” Je vais bien la garder et la méditer 🙂 Belle journée

    1. Merci beaucoup, Christiane.
      Je suis très heureuse d’apprendre que tu aime la citation de kierkegaard aussi. Je pense aussi: sans la peur, nous n’aurions pas besoin d’avoir le courage , non?
      Belle journée aussi,

  13. Hi Cynthia,

    This was a great post. Thank you. I’ve read it on my phone but can’t like it from here – ah technology!!

    I’m hoping for spring, and maybe it’s already in your area, but it’s still mighty cold here for me. Lol!

    All the best, Jacquie

    Sharing the secret art of inviting healing at http://www.jacquelineramsey.com (613) 315-4212 Connect on FB | Twitter | Pinterest


  14. I love the Margaret Mair poem, and all of those beautiful pictures that Hamlin took! Whether you are a recovering coward or a current-day hero, whatever the label, I believe you are inspiring and that everyone has the potential to be such, as long as there is effort made. You *always* seem to make the effort, and I think that is what I appreciate most about your blog.

  15. Beautiful flowers this spring in your garden… I’m so glad I looked in my wordpress reader and found you this morning. It is going to be fun to follow your spring to summer! Let’s Connect!

    1. Blessings to you too, Kim. You’re one of the bloggers who have been through so much, yet continue pushing through the challenges to achieve so much more. Thanks for reading my post.

      1. I truly appreciate your tender heart together with so much more. Your loyalty, your time and your comments. ++++ My family here is second to none. Bless you, Cynthia.

  16. That’s a lovely post. It rang a chord and it got me thinking. When life is tough for someone, I think that sometimes that person will feel and see the rest of the world more intensely than usual. It depends on the coping mechanism you use but sometimes the things that keep you putting one foot in front of another are the small things. Isn’t it Armstead Maupin’s characters who have the rule of three, ‘You can’t have a hot lover, a hot apartment and a hot job all at the same time, nature will not support it.’

    That sounds trite, but I do find that one of those things is usually tough and when they are, it’s the tiny successes, a germinating plant, a tasty dish cooked, a tidy room (that is miraculous in any house with me in it) that keep me going. Sometimes these things are so vivid it almost hurts presumably because I’m over-revelling in them to forget about something else. I dunno if that makes sense, I’m not at my most articulate. 😉



  17. Thanks for the flowers, Cynthia, and the poem, and you’re most certainly welcome. We all have moments of bravery and wanting to crawl back in bed, (or do it.) It’s what makes us all human, walking the road together.

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