A Good Home, Faith, Family, Family Moments, FEar, Life Challenges, Life in canada, Love, Words

NO WORDS

There are no words.

*

One speaks to God in frightened silence

Broken only by jagged breath.

One reaches for faith

And reaches again.

*

Before faith,  the lurch in the belly.

The gasp from the chest.

The hurt in the heart.

And sighs too deep for words.

*

Shock. Denial.  Floundering.

The waves of fear, threatening to drown.

We must not drown.

We search for a fixed point.

*

The heart glimpses the rock

Rising up from the water.

The rock shines with promise.

Strong, fixed and charcoal-dark.

*

The deep water swirls and obscures

So confident in its massive power.

It carries threats of death and echoes of loss.

And loud whispers of nevermore.

*

Quick now: shut it out.

Do not give it the power it craves.

Focus instead on the fixed point.

Look again and find the rock.

*

There are no words.

I speak to God in silence and jagged breath.

My arms thrash, thrash and thrash

And touch solid stone.

*

I hold on, hold on

Fight to hold on to its solid-ness

The waves of fear, and drowning waters

Are all around.

*

One thrashes and fights

And struggles with all one’s might.

And speaks to God, in silence and jagged breath:

Let my beloved live.

*

Let him live.

Let us get to the hospital in time.

Let the doctors and nurses know what to do.

Please let my beloved live.

**

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79 thoughts on “NO WORDS”

  1. my eyes welled up with tears………..

    “Shock. Denial. Floundering.

    The waves of fear, threatening to drown.

    We must not drown.

    We search for a fixed point.”

    thank you for this poem…you gave that place words………

    my fixed point was always- “hope” even when it seemed pointless… the human spirits ability to live is amazing….

    1. Ah, Robbie. I didn’t cry all week. Then I wrote this poem. No – it wrote itself. In about 6 minutes today. Then I read it after it was published and cried.
      I usually apologize for making people cry when they read anything sad that I’ve written, but this time: thanks for crying with me.
      Hope is an amazing thing.

      1. You should not apologize for making me feel…for it keeps me grateful:-) we all have been in this place in one way or another + sometimes what keeps us believing in “hope” is to always remember those times….my husband reminded me of that the other day…my heart goes out to you and don’t ever give up believing + hoping for miracles do still happen today:-)

  2. sorry to hear about hubby Ms CR, you’re right, don’t stray too far from the Rock. Lovely way you always put things.
    one love
    tony

  3. My dear, dear Cynthia! I have been praying for you for days and now I know why. I am so sorry for your trouble and fear and grief. I hope and pray for his recovery. The poem is beautiful, really beautiful. All my love, Clare x

    1. Ah, Clare. I knew you would pray, and I am most thankful. I hardly know how a poem that moves so many came out of my soul so quickly, but I guess it needed to get out there, because after I wrote it, I finally cried.

  4. Cynthia, your poem is a wonderful description of your faith. Beautiful and powerful words. I pray for you and Hamlin.

  5. Prayers and hugs, hugs and prayers, dear Cynthia. Just when you think life couldn’t possibly hit you with anything else; WHAM! I am home again, tired, but haven’t been through quite the wringer that you have. Hold strong, hold strong; you are both upheld and loved.

      1. They are frail, as I expected. But they are holding, too. We had time to talk and sometimes a story told in the morning was repeated again in the evening or the next day. But I am sure I will do that one day too. 😉

  6. Cynthia, what a world of feeling in your poem. It gave me goose bumps. We wish Hamlin speedy recovery, and it is your steady, prayerful support that will get him – and you – through this trial. Keep holding onto the rock. You can! Add “poet extraordinaire” to your writing resume. This work will help others, too. Carol and Wayne

  7. Your poem is so powerful and blazingly honest. It is raw, and heartbreaking, but the search will be well worth it. Your love and faith will carry you and Mr. Grange further than you can imagine with the support of many, many, many, loved ones.
    I think and pray for you, Mr. Grange, and your entire family everyday.
    [Romans 5:3-5]

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